Alright so, I recently got my internet back. HURRAY!

Anyway, the end of the fall semester is closing in and I really gotta pay attention to my studies if I ever want to pass and finally get my AA. I also need to get a job REALLY REALLY soon, as my mom is NOW going to be going to school to be a medical assistant and will be working part-time.

This is a huge fucking bummer to me, as I find it very selfish on her part to be wanting to go back to school when I'm currently AT SCHOOL and I'm not even done. College is not cheap nor is it something I have to wait to finish. The problem I'm facing is that when I start working, I plan to save that when I need to transfer to a university, but because my mom is going back to school, I fear she wants me to work solely to pay for her studies, although I don't even know if that's the case.

I plan on going to UCF either summer or fall of next year. I have yet to apply, but I have to do that real soon. Once I get accepted, I'll do whatever it takes to go. Getting a loan, scholarships, what have you, it's a good investment.

If my mom wants to study now, good for her, but I'm not going to be somebody's bitch just because they want something out of life. If it means I help SLIGHTLY with the house while she goes to school, that's fine with me. But once I have to go back to college, I'm going to go regardless what she wants from me. I'm also getting fed up with my family in general, so going away to college sounds real good right about now.

About the commissions, bear with me guys. I'm going through a lot of stress as of late and it's really hard trying to finish when I'm lacking the motivation to do it. They'll get done, but not soon.

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I really need to get this out also, because it bothers me a whole lot. There might be some profanity.

I'm going to bring up the Halloween party, because of what happened really made me questioned friendships.
You know, I made the event a month and a half early, just to let everyone know in advanced. I really wanted this to go down, because I thought everyone would enjoy it. I have spoken to some of you personally, invitation-wise, if you'll like to go. I know a couple of you gave me valid reasons to not go, however, I felt they were excuses. I've had gotten into some quarrels with the aforementioned couple of you, but yea, can't change people's opinion. Really guys, you could even invite your other friends, for fuck's sake.

The Halloween party came around, hoping that I'll be able to see my other friends who said would try to come. Really, I wanted my friends mostly on my dA friends list to come and have fun.
None of you showed up.
Most upsetting when I find out the next day that you posted pictures of your own party, looking like you guys had a great freaking time.
I want to mention when you guys DO invite me to hang out, I ALWAYS go. I ALWAYS want to hang out with you.
I have a fucking cell phone, you have my fucking number, what the fuck is the reason not to call/text me about going somewhere? I sit in my fucking room every fucking day, doing absolutely fucking nothing. I go to school ONE HOUR Monday through Thursday.

I fucking know that the majority of you have jobs and shit, but that doesn't stop you from just HANGING OUT at each other's houses every once in a while. Hell, I don't even know how often you guys hang out, go to the movies, WHATEVER.
But I always feel like I get invited every blue moon.

It really breaks my heart that I do whatever I can to go to your hang-outs, parties, WHAT THE FUCK EVER, and when I INVITE YOU to something, you shoot me down. Seriously guys, what the fuck?

If you're going to respond to this, please respond to this in it's entirety. I FUCKING HATE WHEN PEOPLE ARE SELECTIVE READERS.